Thursday, October 20, 2005

mothers' clam chowder

This is not "my mother's clam chowder". This is a clam chowder recipe for mothers of toddlers.
  1. get toddlers to nap.

  2. Make white sauce over low heat. (equal parts butter, flour and milk - in this case about 2 tbsp each.)

  3. Toddlers wake up. Remove from cribs, allow to wake up fully before placing in kitchen.

  4. Rush back to stock pot. Scrape gook off bottom of pot. Work with lumpy white sauce until smooth again. Thin with more milk. Simmer over low heat. Try to remember to stir occasionally.

  5. removing lid from nearby chocolate chip container reduces lumpy white sauce stress considerably. Caution: do not add chocolate chips to clam chowder.

  6. find age-appropriate developmental toys for toddlers. In this case, unpacking bowls and potatoes provides at least ten minutes' fun for toddlers, and only an hour's cleanup for Mother.

  7. as time permits, chop three potatoes and an onion and add to chowder.

  8. as brain cells permit, rush back to soup and scrape gook off bottom before it burns, stirring frantically and removing from heat. When it gets unreasonably lumpy, add thickener (baby rice cereal works well), stir till lumps disappear, and re-thin with more milk.

  9. Chop another potato and throw it in to make up for the extra milk. The potato lobbed across the kitchen by a toddler is an ideal candidate, provided you can retrieve it from behind the chest freezer.

  10. don't forget to put the laundry in the dryer. Your eldest child is out of socks again.

  11. open a can of water chestnuts, chop the contents and throw it in the soup. Not only does it add a nice crunch, but it may convince any picky eaters you have that all the lumps are potatoes and water chestnuts. Do not mention the word onion in their presence.

  12. after potatoes are cooked, remove soup from heat and add two or three cans of clams and their juices. Add pepper and salt to taste.

  13. if you have chives or green onions in your garden, you can rush out and pick some to add for garnish. But the toddlers might cry if you don't stay outside and play for awhile. That's OK, your soup has to cool down anyways.

  14. Cut chives with scissors or knife into your bowl of soup. Immediately remove scissors or knife from running toddler's hands.

  15. Enjoy your chowder. If it's still piping hot (because you forgot to turn off the burner), frozen corn makes an excellent way to cool it down.

  16. Which is good, since you forgot to wash the ice cube trays and make ice cubes.


Anonymous kim who should be packing said...

hee hee hee
I am tired (and hungry) just reading this.

10/20/2005 11:36 AM  
Blogger Wool Winder said...

Oh the joys of motherhood! I'm enjoying your blog so much. Thanks for leaving such an encouraging comment on mine.

10/21/2005 9:46 AM  

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